Last week I read through the book Courage After Fire: Coping Strategies for Troops Returning from Iraq and Afghanistan and Their Families by psychologists and mental health experts Keith Armstrong, Suzanne Best and Paula Domenici. It’s a good source of information for military families, and I would recommend that you get it, especially if you are nearing the end of a deployment.

While I wouldn’t call it an enjoyable read (it’s more like a manual or handbook focusing on various issues that can occur with returning veterans), the content does offer some good steps for anyone dealing with PTSD symptoms or who have family members dealing with PTSD. Though the book is generally written toward the service member, one nice feature is that at the end of each chapter, a page is devoted toward the spouse or family member flagging important things to look out for and questions they can ask or consider.

There are some good suggestions for ways to cope when dealing with specific symptoms such as alcohol or substance abuse, panic attacks or being unable to control potentially destructive emotions such as anger. The last couple of chapters focus on returning to civilian life and restoring family roles and relationships. The “Returning to Civilian Life” chapter will be especially useful I think for Guard and Reserve families and covers some good tips on returning to civilian jobs as well.

The courage we have as spouses

This book got me thinking about the courage that we as spouses have when dealing with deployments. I think we usually consider our husbands as the ones with all the guts and the bravery, but as military spouses, we rock with our own brand of fierceness!

I know, sometimes it’s hard to think about being courageous when we struggle to sleep at night; we’re exhausted from caring for children by ourselves, and we find yet one more thing that’s broken down that we’re going to have to fix.

But let’s think about all of the times we are courageous – all of the challenges, big and small, we take on. Sure, many if not most we do because we have to, there is no other choice, but regardless, we meet those challenges! With God’s help, we face those fears!

For every moment we’ve struggled with something, there are many others where we have grabbed on! We’ve prayed, cried and pushed through obstacles we never thought we could.

When my husband was gone, I fixed a clogged sink and had to deal with contractors who had broken our master bathroom’s toilet. Yours may be more serious, like taking a call and finding out your husband was wounded, or dealing with the death of a relative while your husband was gone.

Be it large or small, as military spouses, we exhibit courage every day. So, let’s remind ourselves and share some of those things that are examples of that courage. As a thank you for your participation, I’ll pick a winner THIS FRIDAY  to receive a free copy of the book Courage After Fire.

How have you been courageous? Or, how has God helped you to show courage?

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