With the never-ending infomercials, television shows and books based on finding personal financial freedom, you’d think being prosperous would be an easy fix, wouldn’t you? So why are so many of us in debt?
As someone who spends her real life in the financial planning industry, you’d think I’d have all the answers. I don’t. Plain and simple: The reason we, as Americans and furthermore, as military families have such a hard time with finances is that we aren’t aware of what the other is doing and we live outside our means.
True Story: A few weeks before The Husband deployed to Afghanistan, he decided once and for all to put an end to a magazine scheme he was suckered in to. It stared with a few words of trickery, The Husband agreed to pay $65 a month for one year, but in return get 5 magazines for 5 years. They called back to ask if he was happy with the subscription shortly after. The Husband, mind on deployment, said yes. The magazine schemers asked if he’d like to continue. Of course The Husband said, so they began drafting our checking account for an additional $65 a month. They called back. It happened again. Noticing the multiple drafts on our checking account, The Husband calls the magazine company and finds out that each time he agreed to “continue,” the magazine company was renewing his 1 year agreement. He said he didn’t want the multiple deductions from our checking account each month so asked if he could just pay his balance in full. A week before he deployed, he agreed to 3 separate deductions of up to $575. Of course, not having any knowledge of the impending transactions, I went online and transferred a good chunk of money from our checking account to our savings account since payday was on the horizon. A few days later, the church secretary called to notify me that my tithe check had bounced.
Thinking there had to be some mistake, I called the bank who notified me of the 3 large transactions that occurred in my checking account 2 days after I moved all of our money from checking to savings, and 1 day before payday. The bank directed me to the company who initiated these withdrawals. Soon, I found we had sixty years of Better Homes and Gardens, Woman’s Day, Plane & Pilot, Wired and GUNS for the lovely lump sum payment of $1325. Yes, sixty (that’s 60!) years of magazines, and yes, that’s thirteen hundred, twenty five dollars. For magazines.
The Husband, for the first time in our marriage, was considered safe on his deployment . . . because he wasn’t at home to deal with me. The bank was sympathetic to what happened and allowed me to transfer money from savings to checking to cover the charges and all was right with the world again.
This doesn’t negate the fact that many of us live outside of our means. The key in this is finding your family’s financial freedom by living with what you’re given. As hard as it may seem, it is possible. Shortly after The Husband and I got married, he deployed to Iraq as an E-3. When he returned, we went on a honeymoon (a year late) and came home to find ourselves with $18 and rent due. We cut out all unnecessary spending: cable, cell phones, eating out, mindless purchases.
Every time we leave the house, we’re faced with mindless spending opportunities. Coffee: $2 at a chain (or $4 if you’re into the foamy stuff), a 60 cent candy bar, The Dollar Spot at Target, the hundreds of items lined up at the checkout of the commissary offered for a low, low price. It’s so easy to mindlessly add a few items to your cart with the thought, It’s only a couple dollars!, but those dollars add up. If you shop 3 times a week and put just 2 dollar items in your cart, it’s $24 a month or nearly $300 a year. I implore you to really think about each item that goes into your cart, each dollar you spend. Going out for coffee is a great way to pass time with a friend while you get your mind off the deployment that consumes your life. Going for coffee was one of my favorite ways to get through an evening, but realizing that I was spending $40 a month on coffee was a little too much to swallow, so I cut my evenings to twice a week and started having friends over for coffee (because I make a mean foamy thing) and it’s virtually free.
Being in the financial industry, I’ve encountered many situations where life savings are dissolved with a pen stroke. On the flip side, I’ve seen situations where it seems only a stroke of luck has brought fortune to clients. I’ve worked side-by-side with clients who can’t make ends meet, scrubbing a budget for hours, sometimes even days. It is possible though. No matter your situation, you can fix it and make it better. If you’re in a tight spot, contact a local financial planning company and ask if they can help you determine a budget. Be honest. Take everything to them, statements, LES, pay stubs from other income, exact amounts of what you owe. Most financial planning firms will do a budget scrub pro-bono (hoping to get your business, in return when your financial life is ironed out) or for a minimal fee.
The most important thing of all when seeking financial advice is to pray about it. Money is such an important thing, and my firm conviction is that everyone should pray about whom they go to. We (financial professionals) are salesman, it’s how we get paid. In the firm I work for now, the partners pray for our clients every day. I realize that’s an anomaly, but I know for a fact that the last team I was a part of (in North Carolina) prayed for our clients as well.
I wish you success with finding your financial freedom. Examine every purchase you make: ask yourself as you order a Diet Coke with dinner instead of water if that Diet Coke is really worth the additional $2 on your bill. Communicate. The key in financial freedom within a relationship is communication. Talk to your spouse about what the bills are adding up to. Look at the monthly cash flow instead of allowing just one of the two of you to know the intricate details of your financial life.
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Delta is a proud Air Force Wife. You can read more from Delta at her blog, www.deltawhiskey.us.
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Thank you so much for this post. As Christians, it is so important to be responsible in EVERY aspect of our lives and unfortunately, I think finances often get neglected as we focus on other ways of growing spiritually. This is a great reminder for me to shape up while my hubby is deployed and really pay more attenion to how I'm spending out hard-earned money. So thanks again!
Amanda Healy
Delta,I enjoyed reading your article and agree with the Financial Peace part. I would love to get my hubby more involved in becoming a spendthrift. This is my first time on your website. I like it.
Marva Welborn