Honoring our husbands
September 8th, 2009 | 
Author: My husband and I do not always agree on everything (surprise!) and I would be amazed to meet any married couple that did. It is the nature of men and women- we just do and think differently. And then along comes deployment to test us. I have met many women that take advantage of the time as a way to do things “their” way.
For Christian women we are called to be submissive to our husbands, to be a helpmeet and a completer to them. “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.” Ephesians 5:22 Not being together makes this hard, but it does not alleviate our responsibility to do it. So, how are we to do this when we aren’t even in the same country?
It is a matter of the heart. “The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. “ Proverbs 31:11
Where your heart is, and where you allow your mind to dwell, will be evident in your attitude of submissiveness. Let’s take an example with the children- the methods of discipline and rules that you and your husband both had before he deployed, should still be about the same as when he returns. If you suddenly change the rules to how you would do it if you were alone, you confuse your kids and remove your husband’s influence. I try repeatedly while my husband is away to mention him in conversation. “You know what your Daddy says about that….” “You know Mom and Dad have rules about that and nothing has changed…” This actually goes a long way in giving security to the children. Dad may be gone, but the rules remain.
Another example would be money. This is a big one. With no one looking over your shoulder, it would be very easy to go spending money on things that you may have denied yourself up to this point. That combat pay comes in and all the other little extra pay and it would be easy to indulge. Stop and think about what you would have decided to do with extra money if the two of you had been home together. Pay off a bill? Build up the savings account? Ask him when you are able to communicate. (Ideally you may have made these decisions prior to the deployment). The key is communication and working together. You are still a couple, even if you are apart.
Being a submissive wife is not always easy, but it is God’s command for us and there we will find the greatest peace. Ask your husband how he would like things handled in his absence and then do it. Try to keep his influence prominent before the children and the adjustment will be easier when he returns. You can be a blessing to your husband during this time and he will see he can trust his heart with you.
Popularity: 1% [?]
Related posts:
Category: 
I love your article. It does require work to remain a Christ-like wife, living in submission. But I agree with you in how you accomplish this. I also remind my kids that Papi is the head of the house and his rules stand. Email is great because I can email him a copy of our monthly budget BEFORE I pay bills to make sure he approves everything. Thanks Rachel!