“Would you do it all over again?”

That’s the question a radio host recently asked me. I was on his show to talk about GOD Strong but most of his questions seemed to focus on the plight of the military family. We talked about the difficulties military families face, the struggles of the soldier, the heartache those at home experience. I shared my own experience with deployment, talking about our first one just over two years ago and the new one we’re preparing for.

And the host wanted to know. With everything that’s happened in our world, in our country and the challenges military families face and we anticipate will continue to endure – is it really worth being part of it?

And with no hesitation, I said yes.

This life isn’t without its hardships. It’s true that as a reservist wife, I haven’t had to move every three years. But I have had to watch my husband struggle with finding a job, knowing it’s his military ready reserve (and deployment eligible) status that is the 90% factor that’s keeping him from getting hired in an already tight job market. The suggestion from others that maybe it’s time to leave the military has come up several times in the past year. But we stay. And we endure.

Because it is worth it.

As I told the host, there is something significant about being part of something that’s bigger than yourself. Doing something that makes a difference for millions of people who will never know your name, never see your face or have any idea of the sacrifice your family makes on their behalf. Every time a Soldier, Airman, Sailor or Marine puts on that uniform, every time a spouse says goodbye, every time a child looks at the picture of the parent who can’t be there right now – someone is being saved. Many are being protected. All are being cared for by some.

But as a spouse, I’m sure you can agree with me that patriotism and the desire to do something good will only get you so far. Faith is the bigger part of the equation. And I have seen mine grow in ways that I might never have had my husband not joined the military. Because when God removes us from our comfort zones, He does it for a purpose. To grow us. To stretch us. But ultimately, to bring us closer to Him. To form that relationship if it hasn’t already been there. To grow that relationship in love and commitment and trust. To bind that relationship with assurance that He is the one we can always count on.

I was reading in Psalms this morning and parts of Psalm 31 seem to reflect what many military wives often feel, particularly during deployments.

“Be merciful to me, O Lord, for I am in distress; my eyes grow weak with sorrow, my soul and my body with grief. My life is consumed by anguish and my years by groaning; my strength fails because of my affliction, and my bones grow weak.” (v.s. 9-10)

“I am a dread to my friends – those who see me on the street flee from me. I am forgotten by them as though I were dead; I have become like broken pottery.” (vs. 11b-12)

How often do we feel broken? Like shards of dried clay we desperately try to put back together? We can certainly feel that way during deployment. Or any other time in life when our circumstances seem overwhelming or impossible to overcome.

But this verse caught my eye. “Let your face shine on your servant; save me in your unfailing love” (v.16).

I want God’s face to shine on me, like a warm ray of sunlight on a snowy wintry day. For that to happen, my face needs to turn toward His. My focus needs to be on Him. This doesn’t mean life is one big tanning party. Shadows will still appear. But a peace exists that would not without His face shining, a hope prevails that would not without his unfailing love that surrounds me. And if God’s face shines on me, than ultimately, His face should be reflected in everything I do. To everyone I talk to.

Ouch. That’s a tough one, isn’t it? I know that His face is not always reflected in my actions, in my thoughts, in my heart. You may feel the same way. But we can’t give up in trying. Because how can we ask for the gifts that God so often bestows on us and not be willing to share those with others? How can we seek His peace and care and shelter and hope and not try to pass on those things to our husbands, our children, the other military wives we come into contact with, the checkout lady at the commissary or even that cranky know-it all currently leading your FRG? Do we avoid or do we engage? Do we only receive, or do we reflect and radiate what He’s given us?

This is a challenge I hope all of us will embrace this week. Ask God to let His face shine on you – and give you an opportunity to reflect His unfailing love to others.

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