Welcome to our guest blogger, Heather McDeavitt. She is sharing from her heart about praying with your military child.

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“Mommy, Let’s Pray About That!”

by Heather H. McDevitt

“God is good, God is great…thank You for our food. Amen.” This prayer said at mealtimes by my now four-year-old son was the first prayer he learned, prayed, and continues to pray. Sometimes he prays it so fast that I make him stop, slow down, and pray it again. I tell him that the first time he prayed it counted, but to slow down and not just rush through it. Why? I want my son to understand that thanking God for his food is not just a routine or ritual, but an opportunity for a little boy to talk directly to God.

I am learning that teaching my son now the importance of prayer is a gift that he can open the rest of his life. It is also a valuable tool and weapon that he will have available for every situation that he faces as he grows up. By teaching him to pray, he is learning that God loves him, protects him, provides for him, can be trusted, will never leave him, forgives him, helps him face his fears, is available, is listening to him, and sent His own Son, Jesus, to die for his sins. Does he always want to pray? No. Does he always know what to say? No. Honestly, it took a long time to just get him started with the mealtime prayer. However, my son and I have been on a journey together of learning to pray for the past two to three months.

One night, at the end of February, I was trying to get a video to play on our DVD player. It wasn’t working right and I started to get frustrated. Immediately, my son said, “Mommy, let’s pray about that!” I stopped, put the remote control down, and sat down with him. I said, “Yes, you are right, that is exactly what we need to do.” So we sat there and prayed about the DVD player. Guess what? The prayer was answered immediately. The DVD player worked. I was so humbled and in awe of the words that came out of my son’s mouth: “Mommy, let’s pray about that!” Where did that come from? I asked him later what made him think to say those words to me. He remembered an incident at the beginning of February where I had us stop and pray about something else that we needed help with. He had been listening and watching me pray.

The incident that he remembered took place in a hotel in Mississippi, where we had lost a spare hotel key card to our room. After I, my husband, and our son searched our hotel room for about thirty minutes, I told our son, “Let’s go to the bathroom and pray.” Within five minutes of us praying, my husband walked into the bathroom and had found the key card in his coat pocket. We searched first and then I thought to pray. God used the incident that we experienced of sitting in the hotel bathroom praying at the beginning of February to prompt my son just a few weeks later in another incident to be the one to say that we needed to pray. Did he wait thirty minutes like I had done? No, he told me immediately when he noticed a problem, that we needed to pray. Thus, our prayer journey began.

The reason I say my son and I have been on a journey together of learning to pray is because my husband is currently deployed. February was the last time we saw my husband. I realized after my son told me that we needed to pray that I had and have a huge responsibility and influence as my son’s mommy, especially during this season of deployment. I am the one that he looks to for everything, and I know that I must teach him how to look to Jesus and teach him what I can now.

In Deuteronomy 6:4-7 (NIV), after Moses had gathered the Israelites and declared to them The Ten Commandments that the Lord had told Moses and wrote on two stone tablets (Deuteronomy 5), he told them these words: “Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up…”

Since our journey began, we have prayed about all kinds of things, from little daily things to some big issues. We pray anytime, anywhere, about anything. We pray when we are sad, mad, frustrated, scared, thankful, have a problem, etc. It has been so neat to watch my son learn to talk to God. Every day brings all sorts of opportunities for us both to pray or to learn about prayer. There are times when something is going on during the day where I will be the one to pray. Other times, I will ask him if he wants to pray. Still, at other times, I go ahead and really encourage him to pray, even if he isn’t sure what to say. Those are the times where he wants to repeat after me or says he doesn’t know the words to say. Thus, having him pray shifts the focus from him just watching or hearing me pray, to him actually learning what to say and how to talk to God. If he is scared about something, I pray for him with him. I also try to get him to tell God that he is scared so it helps him to learn to go to God himself. One day a couple of weeks ago, out of nowhere, he whispered, “Mommy, quiet, God and Jesus are talking.” I asked him what they were saying. He whispered again, “I don’t know.” That is the other component of prayer, listening. I have been really focused on the first part so far with my son about talking to God. I think my son is one step ahead of me. I have not really started teaching him about listening to God yet.

Praying at bedtime has been more of a struggle for my son than the mealtime prayer or other prayers during the day. He really struggles with what to say. He will tell me to go first, he will want to repeat after me, or he just doesn’t want to pray. His favorite part of praying, has been to say, “In Jesus’ name, Amen.” I tell him that there is no pressure; just tell God what is on his mind or heart. What is something he can thank God for from the day? Who can we thank God for or pray for? The questions go on and on to give him prompts. Sometimes I will start praying to answer one of these questions and then he will jump right in and start praying his answer. I just stop praying and let him go ahead. That is when the honest, simple, childlike conversation between my little boy and my Heavenly Father begin to take place. What an honor to get to listen in on his thoughts that he shares with our Lord! One night, when he was struggling with what to say, I told him to think of something to thank God for. He very quietly knelt down beside his little bed and said, “God, I love You. Amen.” Again, I was humbled and in awe of the words that came out of my son’s mouth. I smiled and told him that was the best thing he could tell God; even better than thanking Him for something.

Trying to teach a four-year-old boy about prayer while his Daddy is away from home on a deployment has been an interesting challenge. It has allowed me an opportunity to introduce how prayer and faith work together. I have had numerous opportunities to share with him the analogy that even though Daddy is not here with us and we can’t see him, we can talk to him and listen to him on the phone and send and receive mail. Basically, we can communicate with him, even though we can’t see him in person or touch him. We can’t see God, but we can talk to Him and listen to Him. We have seen his Daddy and know what he looks like. We have never seen God, but by faith, we believe that He is who He says He is and that what He says to us in His word is true. He knows that Jesus is in heaven right now, but that He can live in our hearts by the Holy Spirit. He knows that his Daddy is away and He knows that Jesus is away in heaven for now. He knows that his Daddy is coming back one day and he knows that Jesus is coming back from heaven one day. We don’t know the exact day for either one, but we know that his Daddy loves him and that his Heavenly Daddy loves him even more.

Teaching our kids to pray is very important. It opens the door for them to learn about God’s incredible love for them, whether the child is four-years-old or fourteen-years-old. They learn that God loves them and He desires a personal relationship with them, through His Son, Jesus. They learn through prayer and God’s word that He will never leave them and that He is their anchor to hold onto in the midst of life’s storms. Life is hard, and our kids need to know that they can go immediately to God with anything, anytime, anywhere, without waiting thirty minutes. Teaching them to look to Jesus daily, especially in prayer, is vital to how they handle what life brings their way. Military kids (of all ages) are facing so many issues, and when deployment comes, their worlds get turned upside down. I have witnessed it with my son. They look to us for reassurance that everything is going to be alright, even though it may not feel that way. They look to us for security and love. They look to us for protection and comfort. Moms, are we looking to Jesus for these things so that we can point our kids to Him? During deployment, we are faced with a lot of responsibility. How we react to situations, how we make decisions, and how we feel at any given moment is seen on a radar screen by our kids 24/7. I know that my son is watching me. When I get frustrated, upset, or stressed, he feeds off of that. When I say that we need to pray about something or I admit that I have messed up, he calms down and we both sense peace.

Praying with my son and for my son is invaluable. I am teaching him to pray in many ways. First, by my example, him hearing and seeing me pray. Second, by teaching him to learn to talk to God and to learn to listen to God. Third, by reminding him that God always hears and always answers prayer. Fourth, by teaching him Scripture and helping him memorize it and apply it in daily situations. Fifth, by reading his Bible to him and him seeing how God answered people’s prayers in the Bible. Sixth, by reminding him of how and when God answered his/our prayers. Seventh, by just…PRAYING.

I have told my son that God always answers our prayers. It may not be the way we want or expect, but He does answer. He answers with a “yes,” a “no,” or a “wait.” We have had numerous opportunities for him to witness this. We are learning to pray and not give up. We are praying about God’s will in situations. Before this deployment began, we were praying at mealtimes and at bedtime, but now we pray anytime with more of a dependency on God for everything and not out of a routine or ritual. He is Who we turn to, a lot quicker than before. Am I teaching my son perfectly how to pray? No. I am not perfect. In fact, it is usually the times when I have messed up, been irritable, or things have been crazy, that God has used to draw me to prayer the most. I know that God is teaching my son in spite of me. My prayer is that my son will want to continue to pray and and that he will continue to remind me to pray. In trying to teach my son to pray, God has been teaching me more about prayer.

Lord, may I point my son to You in such a way that he will continually say, “Mommy, let’s pray about that!” Thank You, God. Lord, teach us to pray. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

1 Thessalonians 5:17 (NIV)

Psalm 118:24 (NIV)

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