Hi ladies! I hope you’ve had a great week. This week we’re reviewing Chapter 2. How are you doing with the chapters? I hope you’re hanging in there! One more week and we’ll be officially halfway there! Know that I’m praying for you and for our time together.
Discussion questions follow the video. Don’t forget to please post your own answers to the questions and reply to others! Thank you for being part of this study! I pray it’s a blessing to you.
Discussion Questions:
1. In the “From the Home Front” section, I listed some of my “What if” questions. What “What if” question haunts you the most during deployment? How do you combat those questions?
2. What did you learn about faith from this chapter?
3. Which verse in the life jacket on pg 29 did you choose as the one that’s most encouraging to you? Why did you choose that verse?
4. We talked about Jeremiah 29:13. How hard is it to seek Jesus during times of deployment? How have you personally found this verse to be true during hard times?
5. What does it mean to be courageous and what does it mean to take heart? What stood out to you in this section?
6. What “impossibilities” did you list on page 35? How have you seen God help you face these seemingly impossible situations?
7. What part of Peter’s story spoke most to you this week?
8. What other part of this week’s chapter stuck out to you that you want to discuss with the rest of us?
Homework: Read Chapter 3 from Tour of Duty.
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I came across this verse of scripture in a book I was reading and wanted to share it with you…..
Count it all joy brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, that you may be mature and complete, lacking in nothing. James 1:2-4
Natasha
I like this verse. It encourages us to be joyful and to grow through our various trials. Trying to keep a positive attitude really makes a huge difference.
Jen
Natasha,
This is one of my very favorite Bible verses. In fact, when I am feeling discouraged, I just read the whole book of James. It is a great encouragement to me. Thank you for sharing it!
Hanna
Thank you for sharing this. It is such a great verse to keep posted as a reminder when we are feeling discouraged.
Sarah
Great and encouraging Bible verse!
Vanessa C
What a great verse! I find that my faith is challenged daily and it is refreshing to see that it is noted and thta I am not alone.
Thanks for sharing!
Jamie
1. In the “From the Home Front” section, I listed some of my “What if” questions. What “What if” question haunts you the most during deployment? How do you combat those questions?
What if something happens to Adam? That is my biggest “what if.”
What if something happens to the family? How am I going to handle their emotions and mine? What if we aren’t strong enough relationship wise to handle a year long deployment? What if I break his truck???
I too have to put the mental breaks on when I start playing the what if game. I have always believed everything happens for a reason. God has his plan, I may not always see what it is, but there is a reason. Adam’s decision to join the army, a quick deployment, and me moving half way across the country alone. They are all part of God’s plan. I just have to trust God and stop the what if’s as soon as I start.
2. What did you learn about faith from this chapter?
I learned that although we may be a gung ho about stepping out in the beginning, our human nature sinks and a we start looking around at all the things the can bring us down. We have to do as Peter did, “Lord, Save ME.” Only by keeping our focus and eyes on the Lord will we conquer the tests we face.
My wedding gift from Adam was a set of my own dog tags. They are more feminine than the ones he wears and are engraved. One says My name and the date we were married and on the other side it says, “Together we can conquer the world.” I love it. Soon after he left for deployment, I started reading that like this, “Together, with GOD, we can conquer the world.” I was much stronger about stepping out when we learned that he was leaving and shortly after, but lately I feel the waves crashing at my feet. I can feel the Lord reaching for me and catching me though.
3. Which verse in the life jacket on pg 29 did you choose as the one that’s most encouraging to you? Why did you choose that verse?
Isaiah 42:16 I loved it because deployment is a path I have never walked, one that I thought I never would walk. But here I am. This verse reminded me that God is leading me and that he will NEVER forsake me. I am memorizing it now so that I can pull it out when ever I need it.
4. We talked about Jeremiah 29:13. How hard is it to seek Jesus during times of deployment? How have you personally found this verse to be true during hard times?
It is definitely hard to seek him when there are a thousand other things that try to deter me from focusing on him. When I feel myself sinking into that “I don’t want to get out of bed, eat nothing all day, talk to no one, unpleasant to be around or talk to” type of mood. I try to open my bible, pray, and call to the Lord. I can then shake it off.
After reading this verse, I looked one above it and feel more in love with this scripture. Basically it says when we call upon the Lord and send him our prayers He hears us. That is comforting to me.
5. What does it mean to be courageous and what does it mean to take heart? What stood out to you in this section?
Courageous to me isn’t not being scared. It’s being scared to death, but trusting God and pushing forward. The part that stuck out the most was the very last sentence Sara wrote in the section. “Smile as you find confidence not in yourself but in the One who ALLOWED the storm.” This stuck out to me for a couple of reasons: 1. God gives us tests so that we can become stronger in our faith. He allows different things to happen to us, so we learn to depend on Him and not on our own understanding. I even underlined “allowed” in the book. 2. My “theme song” for the year of deployment is “Praise You in This Storm” by Casting Crowns. My favorite verse says this, ” Even though my heart is torn, I WILL praise YOU in this storm.” This is courage to me. Knowing there are waves crashing and wind blowing all around me and still I will choose to praise “the One who gives, and takes away.”
6. What “impossibilities” did you list on page 35? How have you seen God help you face these seemingly impossible situations?
Family Emotions/Issues- I feel like it is impossible to deal with my own emotions and life situations AND my husbands family’s issues and emotions. God has given me chances to get away and focus on my own emotions. Times when I know I need to hand it all over to Him. I want to fix it and make everything better for them, but I have to remind myself I can’t, Only God can.
7. What part of Peter’s story spoke most to you this week?
“Come.” Jesus only had to say one word. ONE WORD! And Peter just hopped out of the boat and started walking toward him. That to me is amazing. It would have taken much more convincing than “come” for me. I want that type of faith. I want to learn to lean on Christ in that way.
8. What other part of this week’s chapter stuck out to you that you want to discuss with the rest of us?
On page 30 we did a match the scenario. The verse Isaiah 58:9 stuck. I finished the chapter last night, but the sermon that morning was about Abraham and his amazing dad characteristics. The phrase “Here I am” reappeared over and over. I feel God saying this when I cry out to Him. It is never delayed either. He is there no matter the time, day, hour, night, day, cold, warm, or storming. He is there. ready to hear me. I also loved the life jacket comparison.
Nicole W
Nicole, one of the ways I have put the “what if” something happens to him to rest for previous deployments was to have the conversation none of us want to have and discuss his wishes should something happen — we discussed All the details and wrote them down, then put them in our “I Love Me” deployment notebook. I personally found peace in knowing I wouldn’t have to make these decisions ever.
Deborrah
I love your definition of courageous!
Natasha
I love that you have a “theme song” for this deployment. I might just have to steal that idea…it would be good to have a song that I could just have on “repeat” during the tough days..along with a “Deployment Verse”. Thanks for such a good idea!
Michelle
It came to me the day after Adam left. I was driving 18 hours alone back home. This song kept coming on and kept coming on. I had heard it before but it never had the meaning it did until that day. The last hour of my drive was a literal storm. Blowing wind, rain, thunder, lightning, complete darkness. It came on one last time that night in the height of the storm. It took on a much bigger meaning than I thought it ever would. The weather that night was a perfect picture of how I felt inside. How my mind was racing, how my heart was hurting. I felt God speaking to me through that song.
I would totally recommend a “Deployment Theme Song”
Nicole
Wow, you stole my theme song, lol! That song has pulled me through so many hard events in life, and I have found myself coming back to it again during this deployment. Neat to see I’m not the only one!
Esther
Discussion Questions:
1. In the “From the Home Front” section, I listed some of my “What if” questions. What “What if” question haunts you the most during deployment? How do you combat those questions?
The “what if” questions haunting me before this deployment even starts is “what if” our marriage isn’t strong enough to survive this deployment? “what if” we grow too independent? Not combating these questions very well right now. Keep trying to order Satan out of my thoughts but he’s “lurking like a lion.”
2. What did you learn about faith from this chapter?
Faith will be my flak jacket and will protect me if I just put it on and leave it on.
3. Which verse in the life jacket on pg 29 did you choose as the one that’s most encouraging to you? Why did you choose that verse?
I chose Psalm 62:8 — I love the Psalms, but love the reminder “He is our refuge” as stated in this verse.
4. We talked about Jeremiah 29:13. How hard is it to seek Jesus during times of deployment? How have you personally found this verse to be true during hard times?
I don’t have a hard time seeking Jesus during deployment, it just seems like I have to keep looking because I keep losing HIM, thus creating more work (anxiety) for myself.
5. What does it mean to be courageous and what does it mean to take heart? What stood out to you in this section?
Dictionary.com defines courage as the quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc., without fear. I really like this definition — one who is courageous has the spirit (Holy Spirit — my words) to face difficult without fear. That is exactly what the Bible tell us.
6. What “impossibilities” did you list on page 35? How have you seen God help you face these seemingly impossible situations?
mending a lost “relationship” with my husband. Since we learned he was deploying several months ago and then the dates getting pushed further and further away I have been “disconnecting myself” and in the process losing my “relationship” (closeness, communicating, emotion) with him. I know it’s one of those games we play prior to deployment, my heart doesn’t want to play it, yet play it I do.
7. What part of Peter’s story spoke most to you this week?
Steadfastness Peter demonstrated is something I desire.
8. What other part of this week’s chapter stuck out to you that you want to discuss with the rest of us?
Dictionary.com defines “rest” as “Cease work or movement in order to relax, refresh oneself, or recover strength.” God promises to help us “refresh ourselves and recover strength” if we will come to HIM. Yes Lord, I bring you the lose in relationship I am feeling with my husband, and this upcoming deployment so that you can refresh me and give me strength! Thank you Lord for this blessing and promise!
Deborrah
1. In the “From the Home Front” section, I listed some of my “What if” questions. What “What if” question haunts you the most during deployment? How do you combat those questions?
The “what if” questions haunting me before this deployment even starts is “what if” our marriage isn’t strong enough to survive this deployment? “what if” we grow too independent? Not combating these questions very well right now. Keep trying to order Satan out of my thoughts but he’s “lurking like a lion.”
2. What did you learn about faith from this chapter?
Faith will be my flak jacket and will protect me if I just put it on and leave it on.
3. Which verse in the life jacket on pg 29 did you choose as the one that’s most encouraging to you? Why did you choose that verse?
I chose Psalm 62:8 — I love the Psalms, but love the reminder “He is our refuge” as stated in this verse.
4. We talked about Jeremiah 29:13. How hard is it to seek Jesus during times of deployment? How have you personally found this verse to be true during hard times?
I don’t have a hard time seeking Jesus during deployment, it just seems like I have to keep looking because I keep losing HIM, thus creating more work (anxiety) for myself.
5. What does it mean to be courageous and what does it mean to take heart? What stood out to you in this section?
Dictionary.com defines courage as the quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc., without fear. I really like this definition — one who is courageous has the spirit (Holy Spirit — my words) to face difficult without fear. That is exactly what the Bible tell us.
6. What “impossibilities” did you list on page 35? How have you seen God help you face these seemingly impossible situations?
mending a lost “relationship” with my husband. Since we learned he was deploying several months ago and then the dates getting pushed further and further away I have been “disconnecting myself” and in the process losing my “relationship” (closeness, communicating, emotion) with him. I know it’s one of those games we play prior to deployment, my heart doesn’t want to play it, yet play it I do.
7. What part of Peter’s story spoke most to you this week?
Steadfastness Peter demonstrated is something I desire.
8. What other part of this week’s chapter stuck out to you that you want to discuss with the rest of us?
Dictionary.com defines “rest” as “Cease work or movement in order to relax, refresh oneself, or recover strength.” God promises to help us “refresh ourselves and recover strength” if we will come to HIM. Yes Lord, I bring you the lose in relationship I am feeling with my husband, and this upcoming deployment so that you can refresh me and give me strength! Thank you Lord for this blessing and promise!
Deborrah
I have to agree with you, the detaching our selves from our husbands is so hard. Its like we protect ourselves by pulling away, and yet want to feel close. it is a vicious cycle. That is something I struggle with this deployment.
Deborah
I can connect with the too independent thing as I am SO NOT a decision maker. However when my husband was away at CBOLC for 3 months, that is what I became. I had us on a schedule that worked for us. Things ran smoothly. Then when my husband came back, I felt out of place. He was picking up where he left off, but we had a new normal. It was hard at first letting that go.
Natasha
I love what you put in question #8. I am really struggling with the whole rest thing. This past month I have learned the hard way that you need to rest, stop worrying and breathe. I cannot take on half a million things and still function properly.
Stefanie
I agree with on your answer to number 6, I have been guilty of the same.
Megan
1.In the “From the Home Front” section, I listed some of my “What if” questions. What “What if” question haunts you the most during deployment? How do you combat those questions? I think my most what if question that worries me is what if something happens to my husband. I rush to check email everyday just to make sure there is little note that says all is well just busy. That’s all I need. Or at least for that moment..:) The others that I do think about are how will we both change since this deployment seems like it will be longer than some that he has been on. People do grown and change even when they are apart. Our son is 16 and I worry that he and my husband are missing the best times of their lives by being apart. They have grown so close in the past three years when my husband was on shore duty. However with all of these things the only way I know to combat it is to pray, pray that God will be with each of us and help us each step of the way until we are again together as a family. We do try to email my husband and keep him as much a part of what goes on here at home, just so that he doesn’t feel disconnected.
2. What did you learn about faith from this chapter? You have to have faith if not you will just drown in the daily life that we have to live in this world. There is always something that comes up, that happens and with no faith you have nothing. I love the comment in Sara’s book stating “It serves as a buoy to which we can cling” Perfect!!
3. Which verse in the life jacket on pg 29 did you choose as the one that’s most encouraging to you? Why did you choose that verse? I choose Isaiah 42:16, that verse says it all. God will lead; he will guide, and of course make the road smooth and never abandon us as long as we let him. We just have to let him.
4. We talked about Jeremiah 29:13. How hard is it to seek Jesus during times of deployment? How have you personally found this verse to be true during hard times? Some days are just not good days and you wonder if you are all alone in this deployment, those are the days that it takes a little more effort to seek Jesus and know that he is there with you and you are not alone. But we must seek him. I often wonder how people live in this world that we live and not have Jesus in their life. They seem to do just fine, but I think the road is much easier with him. I know from personally experience after losing my mom and dad within 8 months of each other. I give Jesus all the glory as he is the one that helped me take one step after another and keep on going.
5. What does it mean to be courageous and what does it mean to take heart? What stood out to you in this section? As for courageous, to me it means I can do this! I will survive this deployment and do what God has in his plan for me. I have to… as Sara said in the book “to show oneself strong”. As for take heart, to me it means be strong, go forward and know that God is with me. As easy as it might be I cannot fear life and what it has in store for me.
6. What “impossibilities” did you list on page 35? How have you seen God help you face these seemingly impossible situations? First of all my favorite scripture is Philippians 4:13 “I Can Do All Things Through Christ Who Strengthens Me” I realize there are days that just seem like I can’t do anymore or anything else. But I repeat in my head this verse and I seem to get a renewed strength and move forward. However I do not have small children (our son is 16, which is a big help) but I do remember when we first joined the Navy and we did have a small child and it was much harder. As far as martial challenges, I am blessed to have a Godly husband and that in itself makes all things bearable.
7. What part of Peter’s story spoke most to you this week? I believe that Peter like all of us had faith, but sometimes when tested we see just how deep our faith is. We all have weakness and we all have fears, but if we rely on God he will not fail us or ever let us down. We just have to take that leap of faith and know that God is with us every step of the way. He did it for Peter and I know he will do it for us.
8. What other part of this week’s chapter stuck out to you that you want to discuss with the rest of us? Under the section, Our Spiritual Life Jacket: I used to be the one who would wear the water wings of self-reliance and over the past 5-6 years I have come to realize that is just not the best way for me. I used to think I don’t need any help I can do this on my own. I can face whatever comes, but little did I know how much I was missing out on with God not by my side. Yea things still happen, things to come my way, but it is so much easier with God walking beside me.
Cindy Pruitt
I totally agree that we miss out if we don’t have God, if we don’t rely on him. I know what He has done for me in the past and I just can’t imagine my life without Him.
Natasha
1. In the “From the Home Front” section, I listed some of my “What if” questions. What “What if” question haunts you the most during deployment? How do you combat those questions?
I have many “what if” questions too, mine include, what if something happened to Jason, what if something happened to the kids? What if something happened to the house, the car, our finances, my list can go on and on. However, I know that if I dwell on these “what ifs” I will become paralyzed with fear and that is something my kids don’t need from me. When I start the “what if” questions I try to remember uplifting scripture and remember that I must have faith and trust in him.
2. What did you learn about faith from this chapter?
Faith gives hope, Faith reaffirms God’s presence in our lives, when we stand firm in the faith we can secure our relationship with God and resist what the enemy has plotted against us.
3. Which verse in the life jacket on pg 29 did you choose as the one that’s most encouraging to you? Why did you choose that verse?
I chose ” He gives strength to the weary and strengthens the powerless” Isaiah 40:29. When I feel overwhelmed or just having a day, I pray for strength. I know without it I won’t make it through.
4. We talked about Jeremiah 29:13. How hard is it to seek Jesus during times of deployment? How have you personally found this verse to be true during hard times?
I think for me it is a lack of control. I like to be in control, feel safe, and know what is coming ahead of me, I am a planner. So this deployment, I believe is going to teach me to rely on him and seek him at all time. To trust in him and know he has my days planned.
5. What does it mean to be courageous and what does it mean to take heart? What stood out to you in this section?
To be courageous is to be stand strong, not showing any fear. To take heart means, to trust God’s heart and to have total trust in him.
6. What “impossibilities” did you list on page 35? How have you seen God help you face these seemingly impossible situations?
I would have to say dealing with my kids emotions and outbursts. They are so young that they don’t understand why daddy is gone, and why it’s so long. I believe God wants to teach me patience, something I know I lack!
7. What part of Peter’s story spoke most to you this week?
Christ’s words acknowledged Peter’s weaknesses, but His actions reaffirmed his love. Jesus will reach out to us when our faith grows weak in the midst of a storm.
8. What other part of this week’s chapter stuck out to you that you want to discuss with the rest of us?
God controls every situation and brings us closer to Him, he loves us so much, He will reach out and catch me when I am struggling, and will give me what I need to overcome any challenge.
Dina
I find what you said about our faith encouraging,that Jesus reaches out to us when we are weak and in the midst of our storms! How true!!
Deborah
Your response to #6 made me think. Maybe I need to look at my impossibilities as ways that God is going to teach me something. Looking at our challanges with an attitude of “how is God using this to help me grow” is smart. (Easier said than done though…I know) Thanks for sharing!
Sarah
Sarah- I am finding with the more impossibilities I face whether my husband is deployed or not, I believe that He is trying to get my attention and teach me something I have not learned yet. I am trying to look at this as a teaching moment and to grow even closer to God. Like you said easier said than done. Each day is a new challenge, an exhausting one at that.
Dina
Hi Ladies!
1. What ‘what if’s” do I have and how do I combat those… What if my husband and I have a hard time reconnecting when he comes home, is my hardest one. i find that after such a long time of managing life here, it can be hard to step back and let my husband get back into his groove. I remind myself what the psalms say, that God is a refuge and a RESTORER. That word is very comforting to me, because He will restore that which has been missed, lost, changed to a better us.
2. Faith, if I remember to turn to my faith and not my own understanding.
3. He gives my strength when I am weary, gives me encouragement, because I feel weary a lot!
4. Jer 29:13 is one of my favorites! I wrote it out and put it near my coffee pot so I see it often. It gives me such clarity to know that HE alone knows the plans for me. That nothing happens without being part of his plan. And that even deployment and SOLO parenting, is a part of a greater picture.
5. Courage to me, means not giving up Hope when all seems grim.
6. The impossibilities…taking care of the kids on my own. Managing to be both parents to them for a time. I have to pray that Lord helps me often in that area because sometimes I feel clueless!
7. Reading the story of Peter I am reminded of how Jesus desires a relationship with us. And how much easier it would be if I could keep my eyes on Him and not on the things that overwhelm me. It seems when I keep my focus on what it is he wants me to learn through all of this, I have more peace and less anxiety.
Deborah
I love that you pointed out God’s role of Restorer. As a soon to be mama and current deployment wife I see a lot of things being changed and challenged. Growth is good, but sometimes discouraging as I see loss trying to take over. So good to know that God will keep our marriage in tact and help our family grow up into Him and closer to each other!
Esther
Deborah ,I too struggle with the “what if” when it comes to mine and my husbands relationship. That is my biggest worry. I daily have to be reminded that God is bigger. Even when the “World” constantly tells you over and over that no marriage can survive the time apart that ours does. I just keep saying God is bigger!
Heather Winters
Although we haven’t experienced deployment, we have experienced long periods of time apart where I had my own “what if” questions. Last summer when Jeff was away at CHBOLC, I did wondered what I would do in case a normal everyday crisis occurred. I didn’t worry for his safety because he was only training in South Carolina. Needless to say, I did experience some things: my grandmother died, I had a flat tire, our electricity went out in part of our house. God provided for me then, and I know he will provide for me and my family if and when we do face deployment.
I learned even more that fear and doubt can crush our faith….if we allow it. God offers us so many promises and we must hold fast to those.
Isaiah 42:16 was most encouraging to me. I think it is a beautiful promise of what God will do for us during the uncertainty of deployment.
I think it is hard to seek God many times in our lives because we get caught up in life itself. Last summer, I felt like a single mom with 3 kids. We had baseball, VBS, then soccer, and back to school. The busyiness can very easily allow us to “put God off.” sometimes I don’t think we mean to, we just get busy and exhausted. If we fail to make time for Him, our doubts and our fears begin to terrorize us and before we know it, we are in a dark pit and need His gentle hand to rescue us. We have to make Him a priority all the time.
So many times we are lead by our emotions. So many times it leads to disaster. When I think of being courageous and taking heart, I think of standing on our faith, on what we know and believe God can do.
My impossibility is all encompassing: to be everything I need to be to be successful in what I am facing. In situations like this, God has given me a refreshed outlook, He has provided me with what I have needed, and He has allowed me to be what I needed to be and see what was less important.
Peter wasn’t perfect. He believed in what Jesus could do, but his faith grew week. He had to be restored. Not to be ugly to Peter, but that is refreshing. If one of the disciples struggled with his faith, it is only natural that I will too. However, I must be able to admit my weakness, my, doubt, my fear, so that I may be restored as well.
Our faith is about trusting God. We read the miracles Jesus performed in the Bible and sometimes we look at those as good stories or special characters, but they are real. We are just as special and our stories can be just as good. God has so many promises for us, so many wonderful things in store. If we allow are faith to be little, to be weak, we can miss out on his blessings. Our country was built on faith. Faith that this would be a better land. Our lives should be built on faith as well, that through Jesus we can do anything.
Natasha
I found your last paragraph to be really…PERFECT. We read those stories all the time and think about what we can learn from them. We never think (or at least I have never) that we can look at our own story and learn from it and see how our own faith, strengths, weaknesses, struggles, and other things can be an encouragement to ourselves and others.
Nicole
1. In the “From the Home Front” section, I listed some of my “What if” questions. What “What if” question haunts you the most during deployment? How do you combat those questions?
I really try not to dwell on any “what if” questions. I try to focus on each day and not what the future COULD hold. I really believe that God wants us to give our cares/worries to him and have peace. Here are a couple of verses that I like regarding this subject.
“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own” Matthew 6:34
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7
I have had such peace in turning my worries and fears over to God…not to say that a “what if” never creeps into my head, but I really try not to let the “what ifs” control my mind.
2. What did you learn about faith from this chapter?
Just that we have to put EVERYTHING in God’s control and completely trust in Him. We may go through hard times, but God is always going to be with us and will see us through…even when it doesn’t feel like it.
3. Which verse in the life jacket on pg 29 did you choose as the one that’s most encouraging to you? Why did you choose that verse?
I love Isaiah 40:29 “He gives strength to the weary and strengthens the powerless”. I think this verse was most encouraging to me because I often feel weary with 2 small children and doing everything myself, but the verse reminds me that He will strengthen me when I have nothing left to give.
Jen
Jen-
thanks for sharing the Phillipians verse. It is one of my favorites. I struggle with putting it into practice. It is a great reminder, that we are called to pray,petition (ask boldly for what we need), and give thanks for the blessings we have been given, and God will soothe our troubled souls with a peace that only HE can provide.
Lisa
I was re-reading Matthew 4:18-20 tonight. My study bible says ["they left...their father" indicate following Jesus also required the disciples to place commitment to Jesus above commitment to their own families.] Reading Matthew Henry’s Commentary, it states “those who would follow Christ aright, must leave ALL (emphasis mine) to follow him.” Oh that I have the strength to leave ALL, finding his grace sufficient and being as obedient at Peter in following HIM.
Further reading in Chapter 14:22-29 again using my commentary, Matthew Henry comments about the disciples’ fears being raised and them thinking they saw a spirit rather than knowing it was Jesus. He states “The more acquaintance we have with God, the Father of spirits, and the more careful we are to keep ourselves in his love, the better able we shall be to deal with those fears.” I have got to find a way to carve out time to read the Bible so I can be “more acquainted.”
Matthew Henry goes on to say “Through the strength of Christ we are borne up above the world, kept from sinking into it, from being overwhelmed by it, obtain a victory over it. (1 John v.4)” I find great comfort in the visual I have of the Holy Spirit floating above me ready to help me “obtain victory over” the deployment.
Deborrah
Thanks for sharing what your commentary said with us. It’s so wonderful being able to dig depper into God’s word. I love your last paragraph. How comforting to know that Christ’s strength is there to keep us from being overwhelmed by the world! Knowing that deployment is coming is so incredibly overwhelming to me. Thank goodness I don’t have to conquer it in my own strength.
Katie D.
1. In the “From the Home Front” section, I listed some of my “What if” questions. What “What if” question haunts you the most during deployment? How do you combat those questions?
My husband is not currently deployed so I haven’t had to worry about his safety. My what if questions usually pertain to: what if my husband feels different about me when he comes back? What if I can’t handle PCSing all by myself? I don’t know anything about it and he isn’t any help either. What if we can’t reconnect when he comes back? What if I have mental breakdown? What if he doesn’t pass thru school? I generally try not to think about these questions and thankfully I am so busy that I don’t have time to sit around and dwell on them.
2. What did you learn about faith from this chapter? Faith is a bit like marriage. A full-time job that requires consistancy!
3. Which verse in the life jacket on pg 29 did you choose as the one that’s most encouraging to you? Why did you choose that verse? Isa. 40:29-31: This is one of my favorite verses.It reminds me that the journey we are on is not a sprint and that I should pace myself. It also reminds me that feeling weak and weary is not a permanent state that I can pray and offer it up to God and He will help me regain my strength to continue.
4. We talked about Jeremiah 29:13. How hard is it to seek Jesus during times of deployment? How have you personally found this verse to be true during hard times? The whiny voice in my head says, “but I don’t want to seek you with all my heart! My whole heart is too busy seeking worry!” I do like to have control and giving up my whole heart might rouse feelings that I have locked away during this serperation that I would rather not feel,ect.
5. What does it mean to be courageous and what does it mean to take heart? What stood out to you in this section? “Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, “I will try again tomorrow.” What stood out to me was the last paragraph on page 30. What if before we through in the towel we focus on God’s word and pray? Something I haven’t been doing much of this serperation.
6. What “impossibilities” did you list on page 35? How have you seen God help you face these seemingly impossible situations? I don’t have any children and I moved back home.My biggest frustration is living back at home and not being around those who understand. Right now my biggest fear is that my husband has to get out of the Army in order to get his masters in his field. I am not liking this possability and the security it doesn’t bring!
7. What part of Peter’s story spoke most to you this week?
Stef
LOVE what you said about faith being a full time job! I had never thought of it that way but it really is. It, like marriage, is something we have to work on every day and continue to grow in. I know the feeling of moving back home and feeling that no one truly understands what I feel, how I hurt, or what is and is not comforting..
Nicole
Hi! I love what you said in #5. I need to remember that! Even if I had a “bad day” I should still be courageous and say “I will try again tomorrow”. Thank you for that great point!
Sarah
Hi girls!
Hope everyone has had a great week!
1) The “What If’s”..I tend to dwell on what if something happens to Ben? How will I handle something happening to him? I tend to combat those my trying to focus on the fact that regardless, God’s hand is in this deployment and reminding myself that worrying does me no good…though that is a lot easier said than done!
2) For me the thing that stuck out the most was the “life jacket” analogy, I haven’t ever really thought of “suiting up for deployment”, but then when I really think about it, I often forget to put that life jacket of faith on when I go throughout the daily struggle of deployment. Having verses in the pockets of that jacket ready to pull out and remind myself of God’s presence are key!! I’ve definitely committed to memorizing scripture during thid deployment.
3)Psalm 62:8 really stood out to me, especially the last part where it says “pour out your heart before him” . It’s a reminder to just give it all to God, every thought, every fear, every worry. It’s not like he doesn’t know what we are thinking, but it’s important to pour our heart to him, to WILLINGLY give it him. It’s theraputic as well
Michelle
I definitely agree that pouring out your heart to God is therapeutic. So many times I go to my friends or family first to just vent and sob out all my frustration. It makes me feel a little better but nowhere near as good as I feel when I pour out my heart to God. I need to do a better job at going to Him first.
Great job committing to memorize scripture! I am working on that too. I have been writing all the verses that have stuck out to me from the study so far on 3×5 cards and am keeping them in my purse so that I can flip through them whenever I have a spare minute. Good luck!
Katie D.
Great idea about making the cards of verses that stick out and putting them in my purse to pull out when needed!
Michelle
I have also placed the cards I have written verses on throughout my house. That way I can read them and reflect on them while brushing my teeth, washing dishes, or doing laundry.
Natasha
To finish my answers from last night…
4)I definitely feel like I struggle with seeking Jesus somedays during this deployment. Some days I just want to be depressed and give in to feeling lonely and sorry myself. I want to dwell on the deployment itself instead of looking for Jesus in it. I know I sometimes struggle with wanting to keep Jesus in a box…almost like saying “here is the area where I’d like to have you” and “here is the area where I think I can handle it on my own”. I really need to focus on seeking him with my WHOLE heart and letting him be a part of EVERYTHING. And let’s be honest, I can’t keep Him in a box, he’s never been “in the box” I’ve just chosen to ignore him, which is definitely a sin in my life that i need to focus on.
5)I LOVED what Sara said about courage on page 34, where she talks about finding your confidence in God. I’ve always struggled with having confidence in myself, and always second guessing myself. In a lot of ways this is has always held me back to some extent. But I’ve never really thought about finding my confidence in Him and letting him guide me. It encourages me to step out more, confident in HIM to lead the way, and not worry so much about what I think about myself. We are fearfully, and wonderfully made and I need to remember that!
6) For me, the thing I’m still struggling with is TIME. I wrote about this last week some, but it’s seems “impossible” that time is going to go by quickly and that the end of this deployment will ever be here. But God has already provided resources to help me get through this. For one, this Bible Study, which has absolutely been a blessing for me! Also, a woman that I work with, her son was transfered from Hawaii to Ben’s unit out of Fayetteville RIGHT before this deployment and he was moved to Ben’s unit. So now I have someone to help walk the road with me daily, and that is SO God at work!!!!
7) For Peter’s story, one of the parts I like best is that just when he thought the waves would overwhelm him, Jesus saves him. It reminds me that no matter how overwhelmed I think I might be, or how close I might feel to drowing, all I have to is look up, He’s there and He’s going to save me.
Michelle
I agree that we have to look for Jesus. He is waiting for us to call out. When we do He restores us. God provides in so many ways. How awesome He gave you some one close to go through this journey with.
Natasha
Michelle- I too feel like it is a struggle to seek Jesus, it is much easier to hide and feel depressed. Those are the days we need to seek harder. I know I struggle in this area, especially when the kids are having meltdowns every minute of the day, I just want to run and hide. But like you stated, God has provided us with the resources needed to get us through this deployment. We don’t need to worry and put all our confidence in Him!
Dina
Hi all. Battery on laptop is nearly dead and I’m too tired to go downstairs and plug back in. So… will work on this as long as computer battery and personal battery last… here goes:
1. In the “From the Home Front” section, I listed some of my “What if” questions. What “What if” question haunts you the most during deployment? How do you combat those questions?
My biggest what if is whether or not I will be able to adequately handle all of the needs that my two young sons will have during the deployment. My eldest has ADHD, and this can be challenging, especially since we are alot alike and can butt heads often. I worry about being able to parent without “losing my cool” too often. What if I say/do things that make my kids question my undying love for them? What if I can’t balance work and home life adequately?
I try to take everything just one day at a time, and I try to pray a lot for guidance in parenting our sons and maintaining my temper (which can flare if my eldest and I start pushing each other’s buttons, ya know?)
2. What did you learn about faith from this chapter?
I realized anew that I need to take time to refresh my faith by spending more time in the Word and deepening my relationship with Jesus, I have been neglecting that for far too long. This chapter reminded me that Faith is what helps me be able to resist Satan as he tries to pull me away from Jesus and stir my feelings of inadequacy as a parent, among other things. I especially liked on page 28 where Sara states “Faith requires that we trust God and place our hope in Him, whether or not we feel His presence in the moment.” This reminds me that faith isn’t just a feeling, but an active choice, too!!!
3. Which verse in the life jacket on pg 29 did you choose as the one that’s most encouraging to you? Why did you choose that verse?
I chose Isaiah 40:29 “He gives strength to the weary and strengthens the powerless”
I chose this because life in general, and particularly during deployment can cause me to be overcome and overwhelmed with feelings of powerlessness and crushing weariness, but GOD will give me strenth to survive and thrive if I allow Him to. All I need to do is ASK when I seek Him… (easier said than done, though)
4. We talked about Jeremiah 29:13. How hard is it to seek Jesus during times of deployment? How have you personally found this verse to be true during hard times?
I know I need to seek Him, but unfortunately, it often gets pushed to the back burner. On good days, it is easy, on bad days, Satan gets in there, and it is more difficult, or I am weak and I just forget to do so earnestly. Personally, I have found that God will always allow Himself to be found, He will not hide from me, but I do need to seek Him, first. I need to be more like Peter, “get to Jesus,sea or no sea.”
5. What does it mean to be courageous and what does it mean to take heart? What stood out to you in this section?
To me, courage is not the absence of fear, but the ability to go forth and acheive despite fears. It means being able to conquer our fears through action. To take heart, to me, means to have confidence in the ability to overcome an obstacle by drawing our our spirit to be able to do so. This is best done WITH God rather than relying on ourselves to get the job done…
6. What “impossibilities” did you list on page 35? How have you seen God help you face these seemingly impossible situations?
some of my impossibilities again revolve around being a good parent to our sons during Brian’s long absence, being in a good mood and able to accomplish ALL that needs to get done at home and at work in a timely manner in good humor while trying to stay close to my spouse while he is away.
God reminds me through His Wor
7. What part of Peter’s story spoke most to you this week?
8. What other part of this week’s chapter stuck out to you that you want to discuss with the rest of us?
Lisa
Thanks for pointing out that faith is not just a feeling, it is a choice. Even if we cannnot feel God’s presence we can take comfort in the fact that He is still there. Sometimes when I am going through a difficult time I end up feeling guilty for not having the confident “feelings” of faith. It is encouraging to know that I can choose to have faith no matter what I am feeling.
Katie D.
6. What “impossibilities” did you list on page 35? How have you seen God help you face these seemingly impossible situations?
some of my impossibilities again revolve around being a good parent to our sons during Brian’s long absence, being in a good mood and able to accomplish ALL that needs to get done at home and at work in a timely manner in good humor while trying to stay close to my spouse while he is away.
God reminds me through His Word that He will supply all that I need, in His time and not necessarily on mine. All I have to do is seek to be in relationship with Him and carry all of my joys and sorrows and worries to Him in prayer. I know that this is true in my mind, but it is oh so much easier to talk about than to remember to put into daily practice when life starts swirling in the busy-ness of it all.
7. What part of Peter’s story spoke most to you this week?
Peter’s absolute trust in Jesus, hopping out of the boat on a one word command without thought for his own safety, until he took his eyes off of Jesus. WOW, that is how I need to be. Peter was able to do so because he had spent TIME with Jesus, and KNEW Him well. Relationships are built on time together in the good and the bad. I think Jesus is reminding me in this story that I can trust Him, and trusting Him is easier when we spend time together often in relationship. He of course KNOWS my thoughts and feelings before I bring them, but He longs for me to lay it all at His feet because I choose to come to Him for everything.
8. What other part of this week’s chapter stuck out to you that you want to discuss with the rest of us?
I think it is always a good reminder that the Enemy also knows us, sometimes better than we know ourselves. We must be watchful, and stay in God’s Word and again, in relationship with Him so that we can resist the Enemy and his ability to exploit our Achilles’ heel, so to speak. I know I need to do this, to make seeking Jesus a daily act, a constant act. But I, like many others, try to “put Him in a box” and only pull Him out when things are going wrong or when it is convenient for me to do so. I think He longs to come alongside of me on a daily basis, but He can only do so if I invite Him in. I also like the analogy to remember to put on my Spiritual life-jacket so that I do trust Jesus and am able to walk on water to Him when He calls.
Lisa
I appreciate your honesty about parenting and your temper.I would never want to make my kids doubt my love for them. When we are stressed it is difficult to see clearly and say and do the things we need for our kids.
Natasha
Natasha,
I try to model asking for forgiveness when I mess up with my kids. I think it is OK to apologize if I am short with them due to stress, etc. They kmNow I am not perfect, no matter if Dad is home or not. I miss the teamwork Brian and I have when he is home because we balance each other well. So far, one month into a year’s deployment I have to say married-single parenting is going better than I expected, praise the Lord and knock on wood…
Lisa
Me too. When I mess up, I let my boys know that I realize was wrong and ask for their forgiveness.
Natasha
1. In the “From the Home Front” section, I listed some of my “What if” questions. What “What if” question haunts you the most during deployment? How do you combat those questions?
What if I get depressed? What if everything goes wrong when he is away and I don’t know how to handle it? What if we have a hard time communicating when he is gone and get frustrated with each other without being together to work things out? What if he changes and comes back a completely different person? What if Thomas gets hurt or killed? These questions and many more go through my head way more often than I’d like to admit. I try to just block them, which does not always work of course. I think the best way to combat these questions is to lay them at the feet of Jesus, realizing that He is in control and already knows the answers. It is impossible for me to know the future, so I need to let Him deal with my fears and take comfort in the fact that He will never leave me no matter what happens.
2. What did you learn about faith from this chapter?
Faith is what helps us resist the enemy’s advances. In my life I think Satan works the most by plaguing me with fears and doubts, and I often give in to them. If I am firm in my faith I will be able to resist these negative thoughts and instead cling to the hope I have in Christ.
3. Which verse in the life jacket on pg 29 did you choose as the one that’s most encouraging to you? Why did you choose that verse?
“Trust in Him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts before Him. God is our refuge.” (Psalm 62:8) I am so thankful that I have God as my refuge. I love knowing that He is always there to be my shelter and to listen to me pour out my heart to Him. How amazing that we have a God who actually wants us to come to Him and pour out our troubles at His feet!
4. We talked about Jeremiah 29:13. How hard is it to seek Jesus during times of deployment? How have you personally found this verse to be true during hard times?
I haven’t experienced deployment yet, but when my husband and I have been separated for long periods of time because of his training I have experienced amazing times of seeking and finding God. When my heart hurts so badly because of loneliness and fear it is actually pretty easy for me to seek God because He is literally all I have. He has been so faithful in giving me comfort and peace and purpose. Of course, I do not always seek Him first and I often allow the peace He gives me to slip through my fingers because I allow my emotions to get the best of me, but that does not change the fact that He is always there when I call.
5. What does it mean to be courageous and what does it mean to take heart? What stood out to you in this section?
To be courageous is to do what you need to do even when you are afraid. To take heart is to find your hope and confidence in Christ. I am so thankful to know that I do not need to have confidence in myself and my abilities. I will fail. But if I put my confidence and hope in Christ He will never fail me.
6. What “impossibilities” did you list on page 35? How have you seen God help you face these seemingly impossible situations?
Being able to survive without my husband, being able to carry on without knowing where he is or if he is safe, handling all the financial stuff on my own. God has gotten me though times of separation and not knowing before. I know He will do it again. I just get afraid because I know deployment is on a much bigger scale than anything my husband and I have experienced before.
7. What part of Peter’s story spoke most to you this week?
Even when Peter’s faith wavered Jesus did not reject him but reached out to him and saved him. Even in the midst of my doubt Jesus is still there to rescue me and hold me secure.
8. What other part of this week’s chapter stuck out to you that you want to discuss with the rest of us?
“Sometimes what we think we need and what God knows we need prove to be different things.” (p. 33) God shows His love to me by putting me in difficult situations that will test and strengthen me. I would never choose these circumstances for myself, but God knows what I need in order for me to grow in Him and glorify His name. Even though I really like knowing what is going on and planning out what I want my life to be like, ultimately I am so glad that I am not the one in control!
Katie D.
Katie D.
I especially connected with your answer to #2.
“Faith is what helps us resist the enemy’s advances. In my life I think Satan works the most by plaguing me with fears and doubts, and I often give in to them. If I am firm in my faith I will be able to resist these negative thoughts and instead cling to the hope I have in Christ.”
thanks for reminding me that being firm in faith helps me to cling to Christ’s hope and gives me the strength and courage to resist those pesky negative “what ifs” and thoughts!
Lisa
Hi Katie,
I too love your answer to #2, where you say faith helps us to resist Satan’s advances. I really like veiwing faith as a tool and weapon against Satan. I often struggle with the fears and the doubts the most, and I need to learn to realy on and USE my faith to push those out of my mind. We can’t let Satan use a deployment to get to us.
Michelle
1. In the “From the Home Front” section, I listed some of my “What if” questions. What “What if” question haunts you the most during deployment? The question that haunts me the most is what will I do if my husband doesn’t come home? How will I take care of the kids, pay the bills, and still survive? This may sound harsh, but to me, this is all that matters in the end, I can survive anything else that comes my way, but this. How do you combat those questions? The only thing that I can do is have faith, trust God, and pray for my husband’s safety.
2. What did you learn about faith from this chapter? So many verses that I had not known before were so uplifting and strong that I now have them to fall back on during my moments of uncertainty.
3. Which verse in the life jacket on pg 29 did you choose as the one that’s most encouraging to you? I circled Isa. 4:17, Why did you choose that verse? I chose this verse because to me, it sums up everything, “I am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go.”
4. We talked about Jeremiah 29:13. How hard is it to seek Jesus during times of deployment? It is extremely hard to focus on Jesus with all my heart when I am constantly worrying about everyday struggles. How have you personally found this verse to be true during hard times? During hards times when we have nothing left to give we have no other choice but to seek God with all of our heart. It seems to be the only answer.
5. What does it mean to be courageous and what does it mean to take heart? To me, be courageous is to face challenges that no one else wants to face, taking heart means to trust God that He will protect you in this courage. What stood out to you in this section? That I am not alone when it comes to struggling with stepping out and trusting God.
6. What “impossibilities” did you list on page 35? 1. Finances, 2. sticking to committments, 3. Resting, 4. Staying focused.
How have you seen God help you face these seemingly impossible situations?By accepting that I cannot do it without him and then lean on him.
7. What part of Peter’s story spoke most to you this week? It seemed like the story of my life
8. What other part of this week’s chapter stuck out to you that you want to discuss with the rest of us? It seems that we all feel like we are all alone in this journey through a deployment, but in reality, we are all dealing with the same emotions. It is just sad that we don’t always have someone to share our experiences with. For many of us, we move back close to family and then end up without other spouses near by to share time and feelings with. This was my case and I vow to NEVER do that again!
Jamie
I completely agree with the moving home thing not happening again. Although I love my parents and his parents, sometimes they don’t get it. Hopefully when I get moved out to base, I will have more support in knowing what I am dealing with.
Nicole
I’m glad to hear that I am not alone on this topic, I feel bad, but my family is hard and very un-emotional. When I need the care of comfort that we all need when our husbands are gone they are not the people to go to. Almost like someone taking care of us and saying, “I understand and it ok, I will take care of you.” My family is not like that they are more like why can’t you handle this? My grandmother has gone through her own versions of hard times when my grandfather was in the Air Force. And to her our seperations is just something that is part of the job, you can’t let it hold you back from life. I agree, but disagree too. It should not be normal and to accept this as normalcy is damaging to the family.
Jamie
Your last comment was quite the opposite for me. I have done both…stayed at a post and gone home. For me, staying on post was harder because we had just moved there and sometimes it is hard to determine who you can confide in. But then I also felt like I couldn’t open up to Bill or my family back home because I didn’t want them to worry. When I moved home, I at least had my family right there and I could drop off the kids without having to explain and because I was there they didn’t worry about me. Plus, my dad was military. He was in Japan for 22months and only got to speak to my mom like twice, so for me, I felt like they understood. Also, my kids really got to know there grandparents and cousins which to me was priceless!
Holly K
Hey Holly,
I can relate, I have had both good and bad, but in the end I would prefer to stay somewhere where I am established, regardless if I am at home with family or not. Now, having said that, I would NOT move to a new place if I did not have family and my husband was not going to be there. I would then stay in my home town. So I have some give on the topic.
Jamie
Phew! Glad I am not the only one. I love my parents dearly but moving home has been more stressful than my husband being away! We don’t have kids so I don’t have a distraction from the things that take place at my parents house either.
Stefanie
Hey Steph,
I am glad to see that I am not the only one that struggles in this area. I do have children, and they do keep me very busy, but I am at the point in our marriage and military career that I believe that I can handle anything. In particular, our set up now is perfect if my husband were to go away. Matter of fact, I even told him that once out time was up here the kids and I would stay. I have since reconsidered that statement only if certain things happen. If he goes where he’s going and gets to stay then I will considering moving the family or if we move to a nice place that has the resources that we currently have.
Jamie
1. I easily have a long list of fears that translate into What Ifs, like “What if he doesn’t come home?” or “what if something happens to me or the kids…will I have the strength to face it without my husband?” Ironically, last night, we watched a movie in which the girl complained that the guy couldn’t say “What if” like, “What if it worked out well?” or “what if we got married?” It made me think that perhaps instead of “what if-ing” bad things, I should “what if” good things? “What if this deployment draws us both closer to Jesus?” “What if this deployment makes me more confident in myself?”
2. I learned that God does not only help those with perfect faith. Even when I try to have faith, then turn around and question it, God is still there to help me. That was inspiring to me. Often times, I feel like I am not worthy of God’s love because I question the “plan”. Under “Caught in His Embrace”, it says that when Peter began to doubt, Jesus did not laugh at him or ignore him, but He still reached out to help him. That is very encouraging to me.
3. I chose Isaiah 40:29. Again, it is comforting to know that God wants to help all of us who seek him. Not just the strong and super faithful.
4. Hard times, aka deployments, are a perfect opportunity for Satan to seek us out and try to attack our faith. I may not always feel like I can handle the situation, but if I can muster up enough strength to simply ask God for help, He will! and send Satan away!! This was a reminder that I do not need to prove myself to God that I am worthy of help, I just need to ask.
5. Being courageous does not mean running head first into a bad situation with a “Holier than Thou” attitude. (Chances are, you will fall flat on your face) It is knowing that God does not expect you to face it alone, that He desires you to ask for his help. This made me realize that I should not strive to be able to say “I can handle this” but rather “We (God and I) can handle this!”
6. My “impossibilities” are having a good attitude and motivation…not falling into the pit of self-pity and hopelessness. I can not honestly say that I am feeling what I should be feeling in this area. BUT, I am learning that perhaps I was not looking in the right direction (UP) and asking who I should (GOD). I admit that my faith is weak. A lot seems impossible to me, but I am working to change that. (This study helps)
7. Peter obviously loves Jesus and trusted him -as I do. He also stopped for a moment to question what was happening -as I do. Jesus still came through for Peter and because Peter stepped out in faith and asked for help, Jesus helped him even as he faltered. I want to be like that. I want to show Jesus that I can step out of the boat. I am still at the point of sitting in the boat, looking at the water and questioning how I could possibly do that without drowning. I pray that the Lord will grow my trust so that I may feel courageous in knowing that God will reach out and catch me when I am struggling.
Sarah
LOVE the point that we can choose to turn the negative “what ifs” into positive ones, like strengthening our relationship both with Jesus and with our spouses and families. Excellent point! I will try this when negative thoughts creep in! Thanks for sharing, Sarah!
Lisa
I LOVE LOVE what you said about turning the “what if’s” into a positive thing. How true is that!! I was talking to Ben yesterday about how all he has been eating was chicken sandwiches b/c the other options didn’t look to appetizing, but then we were like, welllll still MUCH better than always being off base eating MREs!! Then we were both laughing. I think all this will go much smoother if we are looking for what postiive things this deployment can bring out in us and in our relationships with God and with our spouse. Thanks for the reminder
Michelle
Sarah, I too love your suggestion to “what if” positive things about the deployment. I think I will try to make me a list of these to reference, when I begin to “what if” negative things.
Deborrah
Hi Ladies,
I hope you all have had a wonderful week!
1) In the “From the Home Front” section, I listed some of my “What if” questions. What “What if” questions haunts you the most during deployment? How do you combat those questions?
My biggest “What if” questions are:
How does this lifestyle affect my children (Daddy leaving for periods of time and the constant moving)?
Will we make it through this deployment in tact? Mentally, physically, emotionally.
How is this separation going to affect my marriage?
I combat those questions with prayer and lots of faith that God will see us through.
2) What did you learn about faith from his chapter?
Faith keeps us connected to God. Faith helps us to remember that God has our lives planned out and faith will help us to rely on God to get us through trying times.
3)Which verse in the life jacket on pg 29 did you choose as the one that’s the most encouraging to you? Why did you choose that verse?
I chose Psalm 62:8. It tells us to trust Him at ALL times, pour out your heart and He will hear you and that He is a refuge for us. I chose this verse because it’s comforting to know that I always have a place to go, Someone to turn to. Also, the Psalms are wonderful!
4)We talked about Jeremiah 29:13. How hard is it for you to seek Jesus during times of deployment? How have you found this cerse to be true during hard times?
For me, it’s easier to seek Jesus during times of deployment because I have less distractions and also because I know I can’t make it through the deployment without Him! I have found this verse very true because I feel closer to God when my husband is gone and I know that God will take care of me and my family.
5)What does it mean to be courageous and what does it mean to take heart? What stood out to you in this section?
Being courageous means facing your fear or a fear head on. “Take heart” means that we have to understand that we are not alone! Jesus is ALWAYS with us! Knowing that someone is there for us gives us the “heart” to carry on.
The section that stood out to me was the part where Sara wrote, “The most loving gift He could offer came in an admonition of courage.”. Sometimes in my life I feel that admonition, especially when my faith is lacking and my mind is full of worry. Jesus loves me and I hear Him say, “Silly woman, don’t you know that I’ve got it all under control? Follow me, I will be your guide and your strength.”. I am so thankful to have that personal relationship with Him to where He gives me courage to get through the tough times.
6)What “impossibilities” did you list on page 35? How have you seen God help you face these seemingly impossible situations?
My impossibility that I listed is that during deployment (and every day) is that it seems there is not enough of me to go around. I have two small boys who are very dependent on me and I feel that I don’t have enough time to be parent and to take time for myself. I am always putting my family’s needs above my own, so I get whatever is left over and even out of that I have to give time to God. I get overwhelmed by it all.
God helps me to face it by getting through it, by reminding me that my life is blessed and that I do have it easier than other people. By reminding me to be thankful for two healthy boys and a loving, helpful husband.
7)What part of Peter’s story spoke most to you this week?
The part where Peter started to sink. He trusted Jesus enough to get out of the boat, but then he faltered and started to sink because he was distracted by what was going on around him instead of keeping his focus on Jesus to get him through. As a military spouse I can relate. When I take my focus off of God, because of all that goes on during a deployment, my life seems to slip off track.
8)What other part of this week’s chapter stuck out to you that you would want to discuss with the rest of us?
I loved how simple it was to underline Christ’s actions in Matthew 14:31 on page 37 and I love how encouraging my response is to me. I wrote, “He will not let me fall. He will always catch me.”. As a military spouse it comforts me to know that Jesus will catch me, even if I can see or feel it. Faith, it is a beautiful thing.
Vanessa C
With my 3 boys, I too feel like there isn’t enough of me to go around. They have different needs and I don’t want to neglect them or make them think I don’t love or care for me. I am considering a “me time” rule: anytime I walk in the bathroom they are NOT allowed in or to talk to me for the time I am in there! Should give me a few quiet moments to refocus.
Natasha
1. During our first deployment I worried about something happening to the baby (I was pregnant with our first son). I was worried about how our relationship would be when he came home to a new child. I tried not to worry too much about anything happening to him, but it was always in the back of my mind. This coming deployment I’ll be worrying more about something happening to him.
2. What did you learn about faith from this chapter? It’s important to remember that God is in control, he has a plan for us and for our husbands and we have to have faith that they match what we want. But if not, God has His next part of His plan for us that will include something much bigger and we have to have faith that He will always do what is best.
3. Isaiah 40:29. I love the idea that He gives strength to the weary, because when we are weary is when we need strength to get through the day when it seems like we cant.
4. Like I have posted before, I feel like I have the superwoman complex, where I feel like I need to be able to do everything and not have to rely on anyone else. During our first deployment I realized that it was not always possible. I had complications with my pregnancy and if it had not been for my friends things would have been much worse. I wasn’t on the path back to Jesus at that point, but now I see that if I had relied on him as well things would have gone a little better. I know now (hopefully) that He will always be there to guide me through everything.
5. I feel that it means that we need to realise that we are strong as long as we have faith. We have to have faith that God will give us the extra strength if we don’t feel like we have it. Taking heart would go along with having faith, faith that even if we feel week God will be there and He will be all that we need when we love Him.
6. I listed raising our son, worrying about things happening with our house (since we are first time homeowners), our finances, the loneliness that can creep in when you feel so alone. Reading that God can help me raise my son helped me to look at the bigger picture.
7. that when Peter started to doubt and felt the water underneath him all he did was say “LORD Save me” and Jesus did. It was so simple, but so profound.
8. What other part of this week’s chapter stuck out to you that you want to discuss with the rest of us? I loved the life vest. I really never thought about it, until recently as I work my way back to God and learn about Him and the wonderful book that He left for us to use to learn about Him and His ways. I will use the verses that were suggested and find my own to use as a life vest when I prepare for the future.
Katie
Katie, I can relate so much to answer on number one. We confirmed that I’m pregnant with our first baby about two weeks after he left and for about the first two months I would wake up several times during the night anxious about whether the baby was alright, whether I really was pregnant (despite the fact I’d taken more than one test), if I was going to lose it and not even know, etc. I could barely sleep at night and was afraid to do anything active during the day. After the early ultrasound a lot of this fear subsided, but didn’t completely go away. Now that I’m about three months along and can tell I’m pregnant it hasn’t been a problem. I knew the whole time that the baby was God’s special gift to us and that He would take care of it for us, I had a hard time relinquishing control. I felt as though because I didn’t have control that nobody else did either and that maybe God would take the baby away for whatever reason. God is teaching me to stop that, especially through this study, because God isn’t sitting in Heaven waiting for a chance to do something mean to me and mine. He is waiting for a chance to bless us and “expand our borders” as one verse put it. God bless on your journey!
Esther
Wow, ladies! It has been one of those “you wouldn’t believe it” weeks, so here it is Friday and I’m just now getting to this! Here’s what I’ve got.
1. I do have some what if questions that come up, but I’m not sure that’s always bad. As long as they come up as a thought of preparing for a likely future then I think it can be helpful to consider those rather than detrimental. It’s when I sit and stew and do not form a constructive possible answer (cuz we all know that plans were made to be broken!) that the what-ifs become a problem for me. Some of these what-ifs have included “what if I don’t hear from him for a few weeks or longer?”, “what if I lose track of the monthly bills?” or “what if he doesn’t get time for R&R?”. Most of the time the answer ends up being something along the lines of dealing with it when it gets here, but I do try to come up with a general idea. For example, if I don’t get to hear from him for a while, I start journaling my day in email format and send him little bits of it at a time so that when he does have the time and means he can read over it at his leisure.
2. I liked the analogy of the life jacket! I’d never heard it described like that before and it helped me to think of it in a new way.
3. Isaiah 4:16. This verse reminds me that God is not “out to get us” but rather it is He that puts all the good things in front of us.
4. I actually struggle with this regardless of deployment status! It seems much easier to become focused on what I can do, and what I want, that I don’t take the time to search out the scriptures and truly seek Jesus with all my heart. Many times I catch myself just giving little pieces at a time, but that simply doesn’t work. It’s all or nothing in this walk!
5. I think being courageous simply means doing what you know you have to do regardless of your emotional state. Christ was very courageous at the cross, even though He was emotionally devastated. Taking heart means to make that choice to be courageous because God has enabled you to do the task at hand.
7. The part where when he realized what was happening, his first thought was to turn to Jesus. What got him in his predicament in the first place was that he looked away from Jesus. Only reconnecting with the Source of power enabled him to be safe once more.
Esther
Oddly enough, as I take more time to reflect, many of my “what-ifs” aren’t even about the deployment. They’re often times unrelated (what if he doesn’t find me attractive after the baby is born?) or post-deployment (what if we don’t have a close connection when he comes home or what if he and the baby have a hard time bonding?). I guess the same principle applies- just come up with constructive goals or ideas. I just thought it was strange that those are more of what I encounter than deployment related what-ifs. Hopefully I’m not just ignoring the deployment but for now we have it really easy because communication has been regular so I haven’t had many opportunities for the deployment what-ifs to kick in. Those were actually more of a problem right before deployment than they currently are. (Fear of the unknown was hard at work at that point.) Maybe God is just teaching me to trust Him with the here and now. That would be a good thing!
Esther
I think we all think about those questions…I know I do. I some times wonder what it would be like if I were the one away. Would I care if Bill gained weight or lost more hair or got more gray? The answer is no! I would just be so thankful to be in his arms! I think he feels the same way and I’m sure your hubby will, too.
Holly K
Tonight I sat down to play the piano — something I haven’t done in almost a year. As I was flipping through the song book looking for songs to play, I came across one of my all-time favorites, and a reminder for our deployment-related storms.
‘Til the Storm Passes By
In the dark of the midnight, Have I oft hid my face,
While the storm howls above me, And there’s no hiding place.
‘Mid the crash of the thunder, Precious Lord, hear my cry,
“Keep me safe ’til the storm passes by.”
Chorus:
‘Til the storm passes over,
‘Til the thunder sounds no more,
‘Til the clouds roll forever from the sky.
Hold me fast, let me stand in the hollow of Thy hand;
Keep me safe ’til the storm passes by.
Many times Satan whispered, “There is no need to try,
For there’s no end of sorrow; There’s no hope by and by.”
But I know Thou art with me, And tomorrow I’ll rise
Where the storm never darkens the skies.
When the long night has ended, And the storms come no more,
Let me stand in Thy presence On that bright, peaceful shore.
In that land where the tempest Never comes, Lore may I
Dwell with Thee when the storm passes by.
Deborrah
Tonight I sat down to play the piano — something I haven’t done in almost a year. As I was flipping through the song book looking for songs to play, I came across one of my all-time favorites, and a reminder for our deployment-related storms.
‘Til the Storm Passes By
In the dark of the midnight, Have I oft hid my face,
While the storm howls above me, And there’s no hiding place.
‘Mid the crash of the thunder, Precious Lord, hear my cry,
“Keep me safe ’til the storm passes by.”
Chorus:
‘Til the storm passes over,
‘Til the thunder sounds no more,
‘Til the clouds roll forever from the sky.
Hold me fast, let me stand in the hollow of Thy hand;
Keep me safe ’til the storm passes by.
Many times Satan whispered, “There is no need to try,
For there’s no end of sorrow; There’s no hope by and by.”
But I know Thou art with me, And tomorrow I’ll rise
Where the storm never darkens the skies.
When the long night has ended, And the storms come no more,
Let me stand in Thy presence On that bright, peaceful shore.
In that land where the tempest Never comes, Lord may I
Dwell with Thee when the storm passes by.
Deborrah
1. In the “From the Home Front” section, I listed some of my “What if” questions. What “What if” question haunts you the most during deployment? How do you combat those questions?
Will he have one of those “what happens in the field, stays in the field” moments? Will he still love me…will he still find me attractive…what if he dies…what if he is injured…
I try to capture those thoughts and remind myself that that God does not want me to live in fear and that is what all those what-if questions are.
2. What did you learn about faith from this chapter?
Trusting in God doesn’t mean I still won’t mess up but He will still love me anyway.
3. Which verse in the life jacket on pg 29 did you choose as the one that’s most encouraging to you? Why did you choose that verse?
Isaiah 40:29 was my favorite from those in the jacket. As a teacher, I do come home tired and need his strength to carry me on so that I can be the mom my kids need and deserve and the wife Bill needs when he calls late.
4. We talked about Jeremiah 29:13. How hard is it to seek Jesus during times of deployment? How have you personally found this verse to be true during hard times?
It is hard to make time to pray and focus on that relationship when you are the one doing everything…I really struggled with this during the last deployment. I felt very distant to God. But when I took the time to pray, I felt so much better. I truly felt like when I seeked God, He was there waiting.
5. What does it mean to be courageous and what does it mean to take heart? What stood out to you in this section?
One of my favorite scriptures is Joshua 1:9…Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, forthe Lord your God is with you wherever you go. I think this means to look deep within. I am stronger than I think I am because ofthe Holy Spirit. God has commanded us to be where we are…He is with me.
6. What “impossibilities” did you list on page 35? How have you seen God help you face these seemingly impossible situations?
*Bill being deployed again.
*Sending my oldest off to college next yr.
*Staying connected/having a relationship with my husband via email.
God gives me comfort and reminders that at at least I have an instant way to communicate, I have a healthy son to send to college, and just because Bill and I are physically apart doesn’t mean we aren’t spiritually connected.
7. What part of Peter’s story spoke most to you this week?
That inspite of his doubts and fears Jesus loved him and treasured him.
8. What other part of this week’s chapter stuck out to you that you want to discuss with the rest of us?
Don’t fear! God does not want us to live in fear. When the fear creeps in, it reminds me of Jesus saying “Get behind me, Satan!”
Holly K
“Spiritually connected”. Such a understated and overlooked form of communication in society. This is the communication I have learned over the past few weeks that is Gods plan for husbands and wives. Our first deployment my DH and I were not and this deployment and leading up to it we focused on reading the same devotionals getting “on the same page”. What a difference in my emotional stability this time around it has been. I hope at the end of deployment,that we can be a witness to couples about how important this kind of relationship is to a marriage. I know it will be hard work, but I’m hopefull.
Nicole
I can’t find it right now…my eyes are tired and blurry! BUT, I loved the theme song someone posted. I think it is a great idea to have something to cling to during deployment…a song, a scripture , a saying…something that allows us to refocus.
Holly K
As I was reading this chapter, I was reminded of something one of our pastors said once concerning faith. He talked about how having prior experience in trusting the Lord makes it easier to trust Him in the future. I have found that to be true in my life. Being a military wife certainly provides lots of opportunities to practice trusting the Lord!
Jamie S
1. In the “From the Home Front” section, I listed some of my “What if” questions. What “What if” question haunts you the most during deployment? How do you combat those questions? What if our 4 month old doesn’t know his voice when he comes home, what if she is afraid of him becuase he might be a stranger to her when she meets him again at 14 months old.
2. What did you learn about faith from this chapter?That God could do something incredible inspite of deploymetn.
3. Which verse in the life jacket on pg 29 did you choose as the one that’s most encouraging to you? Why did you choose that verse?Isiah 40:29. Well today I missed my husbands phone call because I was so tired and “weary” after 4 days of our infant having the flu that I fell asleep with her forgetting my phone in the living room. I almost bursted into tears and before I was a sobbing mess I rushed to the Bible study we are all doing and read that page. I found immediate comfort and emotional stability in it.
4. We talked about Jeremiah 29:13. How hard is it to seek Jesus during times of deployment? How have you personally found this verse to be true during hard times?Emotionally it is hard. Yes I have today proved that I really wanted God to make my emotions stable and positive even though I have no control over the next time I will talk to my husband. And He did.
5. What does it mean to be courageous and what does it mean to take heart? What stood out to you in this section? I know God loves us all but for some reason I never thought to trust His heart like we are told to trust our heart.
6. What “impossibilities” did you list on page 35? How have you seen God help you face these seemingly impossible situations?That our infant has been sick and in and out of the hospital since the week he left, it seems to be impossible that she keeps getting different illnesses. I’m so worn out and exhausted. I have remaind for the most part calm, and prayed over her often. Truley handing her health over to God and wisdom to mother her the way she needs to be right now.
7. What part of Peter’s story spoke most to you this week? I felt like I had heard this story so many times that it sort of was over looked. I read it with my grandmother tonight because I was so tired I couldn’t see the words, so she helped me. And periodically I had to stop her, saying” what was that, read it again”. As if I’d never heard this before!!The timing was perfect for me for this chapter this week. I don’t know why I still am shocked when God reaches me through all forms of communication.
8. What other part of this week’s chapter stuck out to you that you want to discuss with the rest of us?
God will give you the energy when you need it and He will carve out the time to spend with Him if you honestly submitt to Him and seek Him to carry you when you can’t carry yourself.
Nicole
1. In the “From the Home Front” section, I listed some of my “What if” questions. What “What if” question haunts you the most during deployment? How do you combat those questions?
I always wonder what if something happens to him, how will I endure that. I have to trust that this is God’s plan and God’s will for my husbands life.
2. What did you learn about faith from this chapter?
It’s all about taking that leap with the Lord, which is so hard to do and makes us feel so fragile. It’s hard to realize that when we take that leap with the Lord, we are stronger than ever.
3. Which verse in the life jacket on pg 29 did you choose as the one that’s most encouraging to you? Why did you choose that verse?
Isaiah 42:16 It reminds me I am never alone, no matter how lonely I feel. He will not forsake me.
4. We talked about Jeremiah 29:13. How hard is it to seek Jesus during times of deployment? How have you personally found this verse to be true during hard times?
I find it difficult to remind myself of this when I get caught up in the everyday struggles of deployment life. Your life gets crazier at home and you also have a long distance marriage, that you have to keep strong.
5. What does it mean to be courageous and what does it mean to take heart? What stood out to you in this section?
Courageous to me means giving it all to God, surrendering your fears and letting the Lord hold you.
6. What “impossibilities” did you list on page 35? How have you seen God help you face these seemingly impossible situations?
Family Emotions/Issues-Many of my family just don’t get our situation and they don’t understand the emotions that come along with deployment. God has made me so strong, giving me the strength to put my marriage first, above those opinions of others, who really know nothing about our situation.
7. What part of Peter’s story spoke most to you this week?
His faith! I want that!
8. What other part of this week’s chapter stuck out to you that you want to discuss with the rest of us?
I really loved the life jacket comparison!
Megan
1. In the “From the Home Front” section, I listed some of my “What if” questions. What “What if” question haunts you the most during deployment? How do you combat those questions?
That my husband will get injured while he is gone or he will lose his life. When I start thinking about these things, I immediatly turn to God and pray for his safety and to give me comfort and peace.
2. What did you learn about faith from this chapter?
I have to have faith to make it through the hardest times in my lives and to have faith in Jesus to carry me through these hard times.
3. Which verse in the life jacket on pg 29 did you choose as the one that’s most encouraging to you? Why did you choose that verse?
Psalm 62:8 because I need to trust in the Lord all the time and when I face troubles in my life I need to go to him and he will give me comfort.
4. We talked about Jeremiah 29:13. How hard is it to seek Jesus during times of deployment? How have you personally found this verse to be true during hard times?
At times it is very hard to seek Jesus during times of deployment because I’m so caught up in the pain and my emotions but I need to remember to seek him because Jesus is my comfort during times of trouble. I have found this verse to be very true!! My feet don’t touch the floor in the morning until I have my time with the Lord.
5. What does it mean to be courageous and what does it mean to take heart? What stood out to you in this section?
Don’t fear deployment and don’t fear life! That I need to be courageous because the Lord is walking right beside me during my storms and he will never leave me.
6. What “impossibilities” did you list on page 35? How have you seen God help you face these seemingly impossible situations?
Raising my kids alone, keeping the household and vehicles running and being a good “single” parent. He is my strength to get me through each day and he shows me everyday his love for me.
7. What part of Peter’s story spoke most to you this week?
How he stepped out in faith because of Jesus and I always want to step out in faith and know the Lord is always going to be there to catch me.
8. What other part of this week’s chapter stuck out to you that you want to discuss with the rest of us?
I need to trust and have faith in Jesus everyday and never doubt him.
Homework: Read Chapter 3 from Tour of Duty.
Melissa
im a little behind here it goes…
1. In the “From the Home Front” section, I listed some of my “What if” questions. What “What if” question haunts you the most during deployment? How do you combat those questions? – My biggest what if is always what if something happens to my husband but I have really determined to not let this question even enter my mind and to have full faith that nothing will happen and he will come home to us! If I kept on thinking what if I would go mad.. I literally have to stop everytime this thought comes in and pray and thank god for his protection etc..
2. What did you learn about faith from this chapter? It just reminded me to keep faith at the forefront of my mind always.. When I pray, to pray full of faith and not to go to god constantly worrying but believing he will do what he has said he will do.
3. Which verse in the life jacket on pg 29 did you choose as the one that’s most encouraging to you? Why did you choose that verse? Is 40:29 I often and tired and drained and literally have to pray for strength to make it though some days and this verse reminds me that he gives us strength and will help me through!
4. We talked about Jeremiah 29:13. How hard is it to seek Jesus during times of deployment? How have you personally found this verse to be true during hard times? It is so easy to sulk in the midst of times like this and if I am not careful I will easily make it through an entire day with out ever seeking him. And one day easily turns into 2 or 3 then if not careful its been a crazy busy week and oh crap I haven’t read my bible, I haven’t looked at the bible study etc.. I love that his promise is when we seek him we will find him.. I have found that to be true! I can tell the days when I don’t put him first and seek him! Drastically different!!!
5. What does it mean to be courageous and what does it mean to take heart? What stood out to you in this section? Courage is more about strength to me.. You step out in courage because you have to, like to fight a battle etc.. But take heart, like peter it wasn’t just being courageous and doing it on his own but he was able to do it because he put his eyes on jesus. It was more a heart thing than a head determination thing. Courage to me seems to be an action you set your mind to but taking heart is totally putting your heart into it and trusting/ stepping out etc
6. What “impossibilities” did you list on page 35? How have you seen God help you face these seemingly impossible situations? The 2 biggest ones for me are parenting and dealing with the inlaws! Having a 19 mo old, a 7 mo old and by their birthdays having another baby all with my husband gone is terrifying. Im learning to trust God and let him help me in the midst of struggles. As far as dealing with the inlaws.. I am just asking God at this point to give me patience and help me to be kind
7. What part of Peter’s story spoke most to you this week? “when peter focused on the wind and waves he started to sink. Without help, he would have drowned. Ever Faithful Jesus didn’t let that happen.” I highlighted that statement, started it etc.. It reminds me that waves and wind and struggles and craziness are going to come and there will be times when we are overcome with doubt and fear but Jesus wont let us just drown! He is there stretching out his hand to help us!
8. What other part of this week’s chapter stuck out to you that you want to discuss with the rest of us? On pg 30 it says ‘as we learn to go to scripture and maintain our resolve to trust the Lord in all things, we’ll discover new strength in him.’ I am learning to take the scriptures I am reading and post them around, save them to my phone, put them where i can see them. And when I am feeling down, sad, stressed etc, instead of freaking out I am trying to go to those scriptures and find the encouragement I need. It is something we have to learn to do. It doesn’t come naturally and I can notice a massive difference in my day when I just deal with it all alone and when I stop and focus on what Gods word says and the ways he is trying to speak to me.
Misty