When my then-fiancé told me that his lifelong dream was to be a pilot in the Marine Corps and that the only thing keeping him from pursuing that dream was the fear of bringing his soon to be new bride into the military life, I immediately launched perhaps the greatest “follow your dreams” speech in all of history. It was so good in fact that it worked and before I knew it, I was thrust into a life of moving, acronyms, and a completely new way of living and thinking. It wasn’t but two months after our beautiful wedding that my husband left for the summer to what would be the first in the series of training schools that he would attend.
Our first move to our first duty station was exciting. A new city. A new house. It would feel like we were finally “real grownups” in a town far from home. It was there that I first encountered what my husband feared about pursuing his dreams at the expense of his family. His schedule was tough. He was often gone overnight or for several days on training excursions. It seemed like boys playing in the woods to me and I couldn’t understand why he couldn’t ask off for my birthday. I had a hard time finding friends and often found myself alone, waiting for his arrival.
Looking for friends
Our next duty station was in sunny Florida where my husband would attend flight school. Again, the move was exciting. A new city. A new house. And to add to all the excitement, we would be adding a new member to our family as I was pregnant with our first child. But pretty soon, the excitement wore off and again, I found myself often alone, waiting for his arrival. I started searching and searching for friends. There was a spouse’s club and I tried to attend a meeting, but I tend to become a wallflower with unfamiliar people and unfamiliar situations. I looked for something to get involved with at the base chapel, but there seemed to be nothing. I started praying and praying that God would just bring wonderful Christian women to my doorstep so that I wouldn’t have to go find them. God started whispering in my ear, “Don’t you think there are others out there like you? Those who desire to have fellowship with other women, but are too timid or can’t seem to find any.”
So, after praying and praying for God to simply deliver the true friendships I was searching for, He asked me to go completely outside my comfort zone. He told me to start a bible study. Speaking in front of a group of my peers is more terrifying to me than wearing a bikini. But, obediently, I answered the call God placed in my heart and just prayed He would work out the details.
I first had to advertise. I contacted the spouse’s club and asked them to send an email out. There was a group on a social networking site of military wives in my area, so I posted a note asking if anyone was interested in joining a bible study for military wives. After receiving a few responses from ladies I had never met, I decided to move on and plan our first meeting.
Stepping out in faith
That first meeting, I was petrified. I was praying that God would allow just one lady to show up at least, just so I wouldn’t have to eat the entire veggie tray by myself. God faithfully answered my prayer and then some! Nine ladies showed up and I didn’t know a single one of them! As we moved through our study, week by week, I watched as He just grew and grew the group. By the time my husband and I were preparing to move on to our next duty station, the group had grown to over 50 women and had an offshoot book club that met one night a week to reach the wives who couldn’t meet during our daytime meeting.
Facilitating a study for fifty women was often daunting, but it was one of the greatest learning experiences in my faith walk. It planted the desire in me to help other women do what I did and to take that leap of faith to answer God’s call for them. Here are some of the greatest lessons I learned from my experience that can help you if God has placed a similar call in your heart:
Pray about everything. If you are don’t know where to meet, pray. If you are worried no one will come, pray. If you have no clue what to study, pray. God’s word tells us, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:5-7 (NIV) Rejoice in that peace that works out even the smallest of details!
Seek help. One of my first greatest blunders (and there were many) was trying to do it all on my own and let me tell you, nothing will wear you out faster than trying to coordinate a lot of women with a lot of opinions by yourself. Remember that, “two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work.” Ecclesiastes 4:9 (NIV) Having different perspectives on what to study, how to run your weekly meetings, and how to deal with issues that arise is truly what will make you grow as a group. Give each member a task or responsibility to ensure that everyone is involved and feels a sense of ownership and pride in the group.
Be prepared for obstacles and hiccups! If there is one thing Satan hates most, it is faithful believers being obedient to God’s call in their lives. Satan will try to plant more stumbling blocks in your path the more you pursue following God’s will. It may be that your group remains smaller than you anticipated or that the ladies don’t get as involved in the study as you like. You might encounter unnecessary squabbles in choices in study material or meeting logistics, but “keep your head in all situations, endure hardship” 2 Timothy 4:5 (NIV). If you do, you will be as amazed as I was at how faithful God is and how he can use the least of us to do His mighty works!
If God call’s you to bring women together in His presence to study His word, answer it! There is nothing more rewarding than watching God use you as His hands and feet to bring Christians together in fellowship. It may be scary, it may require some work, but I assure you, God will ultimately bless you and grow you in ways that you never could have imagined!
Want to connect military wives in your community? Start a Wives of Faith group.
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